The Purple Rose

Hon,

I know its been a long time since I've posted something to you, to tell you how I love you and how much you mean to me.  I'm sorry for that.  I know that it means a lot to you when I go out of my way to let you know that I love you and am thinking of you... So thank you hon, for putting up with the fact that I don't always remain consistent in this way and slip into my own world for what probably seems like an eternity to you sometimes :( 

Thank you for coming to me and letting me know what has been going on with you even though you and I both know it wasn't easy for you to tell me what you did.  I know that you could have easily assumed that I would have been upset about it and it would have been easy to avoid it and let it go.. but you didn't.  I love you for that.  This is definitely an area where I know I can do better in - being up front with you about things that need to be said and done. 

So my lovely wife, don't be down today, be happy that I am looking at you and seeing what a precious treasure I have in you.. someone I can trust, someone who is loveable, caring, compassionate and most of all.. faithful to me through it all..

I love you

Melinda, my love, I just know how much you enjoy looking at the sky when there is a sunset, or whenever there is a lot of color such as in this photo...  I just thought I would post something that might make you feel good when looking at it.... Hope this brightens your day today..   Wish we could be there sitting, looking at it for real.. I love you.

I was just thinking yesterday that I wanted to post this... when we were in a meeting about our son, you were laughing and smiling and I dont' know if you know this but it lights up the room in my opinion.  At least, it does for me!  I think that my happiness grows when I am seeing you smile a lot more and I thank God for your joy during those times.  :kiss: 

Keep smiling hon!

I know that there has been quite some distance lately between us and I know that you'll admit just as fast to being distant yourself but hon, to be different than I've ever been before, I'm going to try to be the one to bridge that gap this time.  There are so many things on both of our minds that I think its going to take everything in us to keep from getting wrapped up in everything else other than each other..  

I just want to say tonight darling, that I would never choose to go through any of these stressful times with anyone but you.  You make my life worth living and even if I can't always see the light at the end of the tunnel of the difficult times we are in, you make me keep on going.  You are the light that God shines through into my life even if you don't always know it yourself.  So when the tunnel is long and dark for me, I have you to help light my way hon.  God blessed me with you. 

~~ I love you

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
1 Corinthians 4-7

Melinda, today I just want to give you this quote and say to you.. I want to meditate on these lines of this verse and remember them everyday to be a better husband for you.

Today I want to ask your forgiveness.  I ask that because I am thinking about how God says Love alwayst trusts and I have not been very trusting lately.  I am sorry I've let my paranoid nature get in the way of being able to love you..  This is probably the most prominent quality, in my mind, that I need to work on! 

Today, just know that I am concentrating on being trusting.. :kiss:

Proverbs 31-11~
    Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.

Melinda, I heard some of this proverb from the bible being quoted by a preacher the other day and I thought of you, of course, not just because you are my wife, but because it is so true of my life and marriage to you.  I love you so much!   You are, the noble wife.  To me you exhibit so many of the qualities in this proverb that as this verse says, I have full confidence in you and I really do not lack in any way. 

The problems that I've had lately do not express the way that I feel about you but show more than anything, how I am needing to look at myself.  Jealousy, fear and control are things that do not say how I feel about you at all but are behaviors that I've had since long before I met or married you. 

I love you and hope that these thoughts will help you to have a great day today hon :kiss:

My love for you, Melinda..  is a purple rose, full of passionate color.  Sometimes that passion comes at a cost for you.  Sometimes its unbridled passion I feel for you and when its not in the right context of love and caring, it becomes an ugly monster that would eat us both alive...

I know that all you want to do is run and hide from me when I am the moster that lives in me at times, but I pray that you'll stay with me while I learn the long awaited skill of taming the beast within me that is of possessiveness and jealousy..   Anger and rage and everything that would destroy the path that was set before us both - together..

I love you so much.  my heart swells with feelings for you and I long to have you in my arms everyday.  I know I have not always been like this and it makes it hard to believe that I've changed inside, but this I know about me, this is real. 

~Kiss~

Jealousy and envy are dangerous, insidious attitudes that destroy our efforts to love and encourage others. <link>

Some wise words that I am keeping in my heart right now.   When I think about the things I've destroyed, the things I've missed and the people I havent' been able to love because of this it breaks my heart.

I don't know how many people are as fortunate as I am to be married to the one true love in their life, but I'd love to hear from you, if you are and can relate to the many posts I plan to put up here, for her sake, mine and possibly for others that are interested. :D

Quite honestly, I don't quite know what I'll be posting here.  For the most part, I want this to be something that my wife can look forward to checking out now and again and see that I've left her some new love notes or scriptures for her or maybe just say whats on my mind about our marriage.. we'll see how this progresses.